One of my favorite verses is 2 Corinthians 12:8-10, “concerning this I entreated the Lord three times that it might depart from me. And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, that the power of Christ may dwell in me.” Earlier in the passage, Paul talks about a man who was “caught up to the third heaven.” Paul is talking about himself and is referring to his struggle with boasting. Afterall, God had transformed Paul completely.
Paul once was a man who wanted nothing to do with the Lord but God restored his heart and he became a man that loved God deeply, a man who walked great lengths to further the Kingdom of God. Paul mentions that he struggled with boastfulness and asked God to take it away. God responds by saying, “My grace is is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.”
Have you ever felt like Paul? Many times I have thought, Lord please take my
imperfections away. Similar to Paul, I have had to rely on God’s grace; trusting that His grace is sufficient for me. A couple days ago I was sitting in the car with my fiance and I was telling him about how inadequate I had been feeling. Suddenly, I realized that I had been searching for an area in my life where I could succeed. That desire, the need for affirmation from myself and
others had indeed left me feeling completely and utterly drained. This is what I was searching for with my ministry at Hosea Youth Services.
One of the lies I had bought into from satan is that I am great at loving people and loving them well, but for other things…. There isn’t much else. I
bought into fear and I bought into insecurities, both tearing me down every time I listened to that small voice; “you aren’t good enough, you don’t belong here.”
Through it all, Jesus was whispering, “I have chosen you and I will sustain you.” That voice, the wonderful voice of our gracious Saviour, is the voice I want to listen to because His voice is true. As I cooked meals for girls in the Youth House I often thought “man, I’m actually pretty good at cooking and I enjoy cooking for these lovely ladies. Maybe this is is something I can excel in.” Or, I know I am a good writer, there is another thing I can do really well!
Though I have realized that this quest for excellence was actually selfish. I was searching for accomplishments that could make me feel better about myself. I wanted to rid myself of my insecurities and in the process, I forgot why I am here. I forgot to walk in faith.
The questions that I will now be challenging myself to ask are: “Lord, what do you want me to learn today, what are the areas you want me to grow, how can I reach these girls, and how do I be bold in my faith?”
We all have insecurities and we all want to succeed. The girls at the Youth House also have insecurities. My hope is that through this experience, I will put less attention on my own insecurities and more attention on pointing out the strengths of the young women at the Youth House. I pray that I will seek more opportunities to be bold in my faith by talking about the gospel with these young women. With God’s strength I will strive to put my insecurities behind me.
I will boast about my weaknesses and trust that His grace is sufficient for me because when we are weak, He is strong.